We thought it would be a good idea to post a little background on our journey through infertility. Please feel free to share this with anyone you know that is or has struggled with infertility. It is so nice to have other people who can personally relate to what you are going through. I know it would be so much harder for me if I didn't have two people that are close to me to confide in! They have both had success with IVF and I look to them all the time for optimism and support. You know who you are and I thank you!!!
Our journey:
We started trying to conceive in October 2010. I had so much optimism that first month but it was followed by months of disappointment. I never started a cycle after going off birth control in October. I finally saw my OB/GYN in January 2011 and we tried starting it with medicine, which failed. We then tried two months of Clomid, didn't work :( I will never forget the conversation I had with the PA at my OB's office. She said they recommended that I gain weight (like 10 lbs) and then try again OR I could go to an RE (who she said would just tell me to gain the weight). I never thought I would hear someone tell me I had to gain weight to get pregnant, as I never considered myself an extremely thin person. I mean, I know I have never been overweight, I just always considered myself "average" for my height. Anyway, we decided to go to the RE and see what he had to say! That was May 2011 (can't believe it has almost been a year since first meeting with him). After an initial consultation and some bloodwork, I was diagnosed with Hypothalamic Amenorrhea. Basically, my body was not producing enough estrogen (mine produced barely any). My doctor believed this was due to my BMI being low. It was in the average range but on the low side. He recommended that I gain 10 lbs and reduce my exercise intensity. This was EXTREMELY difficult for me. I mean, I know how much I want a child, but working out is such a stress reliever for me that I just couldn't imagine doing that. Also, I had recently started a very healthy, clean diet and couldn't imagine eating "crap" to gain 10 lbs. So, I saw a nutritionist that specialized in fertility. This was great but started me on this whole fertility diet, which has been great because it follows how I want to eat, but makes it SO difficult to eat anywhere but my home. I am getting used to it by now but I think it is still difficult for everyone else in my life to understand. Sometimes, I think others think I am just making it up. But, it has been shown to work and at this point, I will try anything.
My doctor recommended we start by trying an IUI (intrauterine insemination). We started that in July 2011. I went through about 3 weeks of stimulation medication because my body was responding slowly to the meds. It was a rough and emotional three weeks. I didn't know what to expect and was stressing over finding sitters for Caitlin (turns out it has just been easier to bring her to all my appointments). We finally had our IUI on August 9th. The procedure was simple but I had HORRIBLE cramping the next day. My body produced a lot (almost too many) follicles, which was probably the cause of the awful cramps. I couldn't get off the couch and was home alone with Caitlin all day. She was such a good girl! Needless to say, the IUI was not successful. Such a bummer :( To top it off, I developed cysts after that cycle, so we had to wait a month. Then, we were about to start the next round at the end of September and I developed fluid in my uterus. So, that IUI round was canceled too. I was just crushed. I didn't understand why my body was rejecting all of this.
At this point, we met with our doctor and he thought that IVF was the only way to go at this point. My body was requiring such high doses of meds that IUIs were too risky. I was at great risk of multiples (triplets, etc) because my body was producing so many follicles. He said that IVF was a better option because they are able to control the amount of embryos implanted! Never in a million years would I think I would ever be going through IVF. But, we are very fortunate to live in Illinois and have IVF covered by insurance. I couldn't imagine having the financial burden on top of all the stress that goes along with fertility treatments.
We started our first round of IVF at the end of November 2011. Our protocol was as follows:
Birth Control for 3 weeks
Lupron shots
Lupron and Follistim Shots
150 Follistim/150 Menopur/5 Lupron
HCG Shot was on 11/29/11
Egg Retrieval 12/1/11 21 eggs retrieved
Progesterone Shots started on 12/2/11
14 eggs were fertilized
12/2/11: had 9 embryos
12/3/11: 6 embryos survived
12/4/11: Day 3 transfer of 2 embryos (an 8 cell and a 6 cell)
12/6/11: started estrogen patches
12/16/11: pregnancy test day, we weren't pregnant, so devastated :(
We met with our doctor on 12/22 to discuss the results of the first IVF round. He stated that we had poor embryo quality, which was a concern. He also said it might be due to poor egg quality, which was so devastating for me to hear. I already have had enormous amounts of guilt because I have felt like it is all my fault that we can't get pregnant. So, this was just like the icing on the cake. Luckily, I started seeing a psychologist in December who has helped me sort through all these feelings. My doctor also suggested that I start going to acupuncture (great, something else to add to my crazy schedule). I started going to acupuncture in January 2012. I have to say, I actually LOVE it and hope that it helps.
We were scheduled to start our next IVF round in January but that was put on hold because of a totally separate issue. In November 2011, I noticed a lump on my upper right thigh. I mentioned it to my GP who suggested I see a surgeon. I finally met with the surgeon in January and he recommended an MRI. The results of the MRI weren't good, so I then had to have a biopsy of the tumor. It turned out to be something called nodular fasciitis. I had to have the tumor removed 2/24/12 and it is now healing nicely! However, this has delayed everything 3 months. It has been so discouraging and upsetting. I am just hoping it has all been worth the wait!
